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Creationism
I remember the first year that I (well, we) served as Santa for our little family, our distant east coast outpost celebration so far from the rest of our clan. Up until then--even as a married couple--I had gone to bed at a certain point so I didn't have to see Santa do his work. I just didn't want to see behind that curtain, even though I knew what was there.
So that first year was both thrilling and, well, a little empty. I was used to being a consumer of the magic. Not the magic creator. It was daunting and humbling. I realized just how much my own parents had done through the years to create that magic that I hungrily lapped up.
I'm feeling that all over again, the distinct difference between consuming and creating.
Over the last few weeks, I've been working on writing down some stories that have been swirling around my head. Now, I've always been a reader. I love to get immersed in a great book, to be on the receiving end of that literary magic. But. I'm newly daunted by the creation of that magic, suddenly humbled and appreciative of all of those manymany thousands of pages I have gobbled up. On one level I knew it was work. Now I know it on another level. I want to write to each of the authors or visit them and bow at their feet and apologize for how lightly I took their seeming effortlessness.
So I pull out my favorites, hoping their magic touch of dialogue~setting~characters~details will seep through their pages to my fingertips and out to my own writing. Thank you Harper Lee, Justin Cronin, Susan Minot, Wallace Stegner, Anne Lamott, Kent Haruf, and others for being my pantheon of writing gods. I aspire to your magic and I'll probably never get there.
* * *Painter Paul Ferney
paintings via his website
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Painter Nathan Florence
(& disclosure: he's my second cousin)
paintings via his website
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Painter Claerwen James
images via Flowers East Gallery
I think if I could go back and ask for a talent, I would hurry over to the painting line. Or the broadway singing one.
Saturday, March 29, 2008
Reader Comments (7)
The creative process is one of my favorite endeavors be it in writing, art, speaking, cooking or anything I do. The angst of a perfectionist can truly come alive and fester in this process (as I have experienced) or be rooted out by engaging repeatedly in the process (as I have learned). The first option is exhausting, the second is when it becomes magical, again.
Those paintings and photos were beautiful. Yay for you for having a painter cousin. I feel totally ripped off in the artistic department. My dad and all three of my siblings are artistic. Me...not at all.
Are you writing a book? Were those musings because you are trying your hand at writing yourself? Or is this the writing for your PhD?
I agree. Reading great stories makes me just yearn to write great stories!
I can't wait to read yours.
I am so glad you are writing. You have a writer in you - and we see her every time you post a blog. I think others need to see her, too. Keep at it, friend. Let her voice be heard.
I agree with Christie--I read you for inspiration in my own (pretend) writing. Also, thanks for the paintings, especially those of Nathan Florence. I don't assume to know where your cousin is from or where he painted those pictures but when I saw them I felt in my bones I know that place. I know that fence, and that sweeping grass. Those trees and stormy mountains, that sprinkler wheel. I know those aspens, that knoll, the lone tree at dusk. And I cried a little. Because as much as I love my own little family and our life here I miss that place. That place that is my father, and his father. That place that is my own red shoes.
i love the description of consumer vs creator--as a newer parent, i do miss being the consumer sometimes:)
I majored in Humanities and always ache just a little to be the creator instead of just the appreciator.
Yesterday my kids and I went to the BYU Museum of Art and I appreciated my head off...and hopefully taught them how to, as well.