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Keeping on
Best of .09 | Best challenge of the year
I'm a serial starter, an enthusiastic idea person. You want to brainstorm? Pull up a chair, I'll heartily join you with verve. I run headlong into new projects with good intentions and start-up energy swirling in my wake.
But there's a flip side.
My weakness shows up as I try to trudge on in that middle place where the doubts creep in. Why am I even doing this? I'll ask. Maybe this isn't such a great idea. Sometimes the lull is brought on by other people's opinions, sometimes it's just the loss of momentum. Case in point: Look! Here I am in the 9th or 11th day of the year-in-review posts (depending on how you count them) and I'm starting to be late. Sigh. Typical, I scold to myself. But I'm not really a quitter, just a fizzler.
This year my biggest challenge has been to learn how to harness the energy of that initial spark and plan for the time when the lulls come and I just don't really want to [fill in the blank] anymore and I'll need something to carry me through.
Through it, I've learned the sweetness and integrity of following through to the end, even if it means limping along for while until the spark returns. And it does return!
I've learned that I don't have to do everything that comes across my mind, that it's okay to have idea orphans for a while.
I've realized that just because I can do something, don't mean I should do it. I'm getting better at using my judgment to filter which ideas/projects/requests are worthwhile.
And, probably most importantly, I've learned to be kinder to my weaknesses. They respond not to heartless, ruthless stomping but to compassion and a nice margin with plenty of room for failure.
. . .
Best of 09 year in review, Gwen Bell style.
What was *your* best or biggest challenge this year?
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Reader Comments (6)
idea orphans. Well put. I am your soul sister.
My house is full of io's. But I am a good, nurturing surrogate mom to all those babes that died in the middle place.
;)
i think everyone can relate to this on some level. i feel this was a good lesson learned for me this year as well. and it's liberating to embrace the tendencies of your natural man... even if they are an enemy to god. :O)
This is the gift of turning 40. Forty brings better self awareness, the ability to say no, shunning of guilt and the freedom of caring what anyone else thinks. I have learned that others are also too self absorbed to really care how I live my life.
My biggest challenges continue to be chronic health issues and learning to balance my time and energy so I don't burn myself out. It is so hard to slow down on a good day because I want to squeeze out every drop of goodness that I can. But then I suffer later because i did too much, didn't rest, blah, blah, blah. I got a major scolding from my cardiologist the other day.
I think my biggest challenge this year was believing in myself enough to try new things. I feel so much the stronger for it, but the initial leap of faith is not something I'm good at.
Love the phrase 'idea orphan.'
I have the exact challenge. I have great ideas but then actually doing them? Fizzle. I tend to disappoint and that is annoying. Congratulations on working through it. I'll get there.
The lulls are the worst, truly. If I were a superhero I would be "Gung Ho Girl" -- but, does anyone ever wonder how Gung Ho Girl unwinds. Answer, becoming so inert it is as if she is suspended in time and space. Maybe this should be at the top of my "ways to improve in the future" list -- I am not resolved not to make New Year's resolutions anymore, the failure to follow through is more than I can bear.