It became clear, halfway through last year, that I needed to figure out a way to help all three have better study skills and planning. (This may or may not have had something to do with the mid-year report of one of the kids where missing homework assignments and such had led to a midterm warning of a very low grade. Measures were needed.)
I've always loved hyggli family routines and cultural traditions. I think I should have been British, given how much I adore the tea time tradition. So I stole the essence of tea time, slapped the title Scholar Time on it, and made it our own new tradition.
Scholar Time is from 3 to 5 at our house in the winter, later in the fall and spring (with a little variation for lessons and sports practices, as needed). It's nothing revolutionary: just a set aside learning time for my kids and me.
Truly, it's all in the spin and marketing, folks! I try to make it more of a nice ritual. Put on some music, light a couple of candles, sometimes add cocoa or a treat.
Basically:
We all unload our homework, books, etc. on the table. If there's homework, they do it (I do mine, too). But it's not just about homework.
I make everyone fess up about looming tests, quizzes, etc. If someone has a project coming up, we map out the small steps to make it feel more manageable. I ask (I learned this from my Aunt Annette) how much support they want: minimal (just reminders about due dates, etc. and putting it on the calendar), some (need materials from the store, want to brainstorm, need a proofreader), or a lot (don't know where to start, help with understanding the concepts, helping organize an outline, field trips [our high school has the freshmen find and catalog 100 different leaf varieties; that's a big one]).
If someone comes upon something really interesting, they share it with the rest of us and we stop and chat about it.
Here are the keys:
- Keep in mind my kids are 11, 13, 16 and all in middle school and high school. Two hours isn't too much to ask; yours might only need 1/2 hour. We try to do it Monday through Thursday and make Friday afternoons an anything-goes day but usually at least one other day just doesn't work out.
- I am there to help out. Available. Sitting right there. I think this is the biggest shift.
- It's quiet as possible (for the easily distracted among us)
- It's scholar time, not just homework time. So if they don't have homework (or finish early), they go over something they've learned, study for a test, outline an essay for next week, read ahead, go practice their instrument (out of earshot).
- When they're done, they pack up their backpacks for tomorrow (I'm so over the hurry-before-the-bus-comes-I-can't-find-my-essay-and-math-homework). Celebrate another day of learning, woot!
As I said, nothing revolutionary but a great improvement over our laissez-faire homework-doing of the past. That particular low midterm grade? It sprang back up into the zone of better grades. Like most "programs" sometimes we're better at it than others. But I do look forward to a couple of hours of sitting with my kids + watching them learn. And I get my hyggli ritual.
(Maybe everyone already does something like this and it's just taken me 11 years to catch on! Recently a couple of families we know have asked about it since Sam was talking about "scholar time" so I thought I'd put it out there in case it makes sense for others to do, too.)
Plus, I'd love to hear any suggestions about what you do around your house to help kids stay on top of the academic demands (or what you did as a student). I think my kids have more homework now than I had as a college student!
Reader Comments (7)
You are my mentor.
I should have been British as well, I love tea time, love tea, cucumber sandwiches, rain, and of course, Adam Dalgliesh.
Your ideas are great, I am going to adopt them as my own. I think my daughter will do well with a sort of tea time. We've been struggling to find a best way for her. She just had an all day evaluation with a pediatric neuropsych and I think your approach would fit in nicely with what we are learning about her approach to education.
Thanks Annie!
What an excellent plan. I am going to implement it. Thanks for sharing such a great idea.
fabulous ideas- I love the concrete approach and use fo ritual- I look forward to having kids in a more similar stage- as now the homework hour is out of control!! 4th grader + wild 4 yr old + squwaking baby- not conducive to peaceful learning and my oldest is HIGHLY distractible- he would do well from such a system
we just shifted our location. we used to do something a little less sophisticated than this in our kitchen, but now the kids meet me at my school, and we do it there. no candles allowed, however.
the perk is i'm getting paid for it, since i'm contracted to be in the building until 3:45. how's that for icing?
We do something similar too, but haven't had much success with the younger two. I think middle school changes the game on things a little bit. LOVE your idea.
"We" always do our homework right after school, with pretty much no exceptions. I know they've been in school all day, but it was worse trying to get them back into that frame of mind later on in the evening. So, I am also present and available {and snack-waitressing} for a couple of hours each day after school. {Sometimes I kind of feel like I'm on a merry-go-round--help one kid, move on to the next, help one kid, move on to the next, help one kid.... But it's worth it.}
such a GREAT idea! i've always been partial to "tea" time myself. i'm tucking this scholar time idea into my ideas for later...with a kindergartener there isn't much by way of homework yet! your photo is great by the way. i am with you though--really really dislike photos of myself.