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Arranging marriages (slyly)
We've had a houseguest last night and today, a top-notch 11-year-old boy from Arizona. His dad (Hi Chuck!) and mom (Hello Angie!) are friends from wayyyyy back. As in, G dated Angie in high school (not as awkward as you would think. Anymore!), Chuck's one of his best friends from the old days, & Chuck and I were pals in person and by pen for years, etc. etc. (Logan people tend to play musical chairs with dating partners until the combination feels right, I guess.)
Anyway, as I was saying before I meandered into friendship geneology, Chuck had business here and brought his son S along for some quality time but needed a place for him to be while he did said business.
I excused Maddy and Sam from school today (we're Homeschooling for One Day, I told them) and showed them the town. We did the Old North Bridge. We ate at Helen's. It wasn't until I was sitting on a bench in the Museum of Science, watching them try out the experiments--laughing & teasing & getting along--that I started having Scheming Thoughts.
I have to admit it's happened before. Is it such a crime that my mind starts jumping ahead a decade (and a half...ish?) to marriage material? We don't live in a culture that arranges marriages formally and we certainly are past the days when property and social advancement and inheritance all depend on the advantageous union of two families.
Am I overly Mrs-Bennet-ish (When you have five daughters, Lizzie, tell me what else will occupy your thoughts, and then perhaps you can understand) to get giddy at the thought of matching my children with the kids of our friends? We know how they've been raised, we've watched them grow (albeit sometimes via Christmas cards), and we'de love to keep them in our lives FOREVER (too stalkerish?). We know quality stock when we see it (and S was such a cute, funny, well- behaved guest...great future material, I'm sure).
Here's the kicker: if kids get one whiff of this idea, it will never happen. There's no stronger ardor repellent than the maternal words "what about that nice [last name] boy?" for killing the passion in a young girl's heart.
So, instead. A holiday together here, a taped up Christmas card there. Exchanging e-mail addresses. One must start so early. Mrs. Bennet would be so proud.
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Reader Comments (7)
Way to go Mrs. Bennett. I must admit I think the same sorts of scheming thoughts. I do think I know best what my kids should do. Of course.
I bet your kids enjoyed your "homeschooling for a day." I like that spin on a day of hookey.
Oh, I have already matched up two of my three children. Still waiting for that special girl to come along for my oldest. But the younger two? Betrothed. They just don't know it yet. Match on, sista.
Mrs. Bennett would indeed be thrilled with the prospect. I have been matching for years...what else do I have to occupy my time? I agree though, you must not be as aggressive as Mrs Bennett-I like the exchange of email and Christmas card (photo included).
I love it. my little one already has his match too! (like it or not...)and for the same reasons... great stock, friends for family! what more could you ask for?!
I have spouses picked out for all of my children, and second-choice candidates as well. Of course, it will never happen, but one can hope.
There is a family where I live that has a buncha kids (like, 5 or 6 or 7) and they have all gone off to college but ended up marrying locals. So they all live in town near their parents, and the parents/in-laws are friends, all in the same stake. How awesome would that be?
oh i love it! i am still convinced that i will leave braces on my daughter, throw in some head gear, and give her a perm until she is at least 25...she's only 7 months and i'm already worried about all the boys out there!
My kids are usually matching themselves up with the children of our friends and usually our reply is "Over my dead body!"