Last Lecture for now

Today was the last session of the human development course I taught this semester. To wrap it up, I asked the students to bring in something about a life story, real or fictional (novel/movie clip/article, etc.) to relate to some aspect of the course.  I loved what they came up with.  It ended up taking the whole class since everyone had given it such thought and had so much to say.  If you have a few minutes, the links (I starred the ones that were especially compelling) are wonderful:

• Father of the Bride 2 -- middle adulthood, Levinson's theories of midlife change
  
• The Perks of Being a Wallflower -- attachment, identity formation in adolescence (Erikson, Marcia)
  
• *Mean Girls clip (3:43-5:27)-- identity moratorium, adolescent social aggression
  
• Smashed -- Erikson's intimacy vs. isolation stage, inhibited by alcoholism
  
• song "Time of Your Life" -- developmental transitions, exceptions to set theory
  
• **About Schmidt final letter-- Erikson's ego integrity vs. despair in mid adulthood
  
• song Mr. Larkin by State Radio -- older adulthood, prejudice
  
• Old School -- exceptions to older adulthood preconceptions
  
• Goonies -- middle childhood Erikson's industry vs. inferiority stage
  
• *the Last Lecture -- loss, ego transendence, Erikson's generativity, 
  
• Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius -- early adulthood and Erikson's intimacy vs. isolation
  
• When I am an Old Woman -- older adulthood, theories of positive aging
  
• **The Giving Tree (2) -- lifespan development, attachment, Erikson's stages
  
• *Guys and Dolls -- (first few minutes of documentary of Lars and the Real Girl-type relationships) social work practice, culture/microculture, Erikson's intimacy/isolation 
  
• Tuesdays with Morrie -- ego transendence and generativity
  
• Archie comic book -- adolescence transition, scaffolding, conceptions of adolescence
  
• Dalai Lama -- moral development, ego transcendence, older adulthood, "good death"
  
• Mr. Rogers -- social learning theory, attachment
  

It feels so great to be done but I'm going to really miss that class, those students.  They were very patient & accepting of this green, nervous, shaky-voiced first-time prof.  

class of idealistic, passionate grad students + human development course content =

life affirming and hopeful alchemy

Notes for my pockets

I was talking with a friend who has been undergoing treatment for cancer.  She commented that it's been hard to reconcile the polarity that everything has changed and yet nothing has changed. Everything--her perspective, her sense of herself, of security, the new focus on healing--has changed.  Yet she looks out her window and kids are still going to school, the seasons change as always, life goes on. Living with both realities, she said, is difficult but comforting.

She said it reminded her of "an old midrash [a rabbinic story...she's Jewish] about a sage who always kept two notes -- both quotes from scripture -- on his person...one in each of his coat pockets.  The first one reminded him that "the world was created for you" -- God set this glorious table of creation, all the wonders of the world, just for humans to experience and enjoy.  

"The second one reminded him that "from dust you came, and to dust you will return" -- individuals are so terribly impermanent, inconsequential... they come and go in an instant of history." 

I love the thought of these folded up, tattered contradictory notes keeping the wise man both inspired and grounded.

{And doesn't this little film clip demonstrate both of these:}

via Keith Loutit's Vimeo

I've been thinking about that story ever since.  

About contradictions.  

And choosing between polarities.  

Or not choosing between.  

Because sometimes I feel like a walking contradiction (and it frustrates me!): 

Shy/friendly. Adventurous/homebody. Confident/insecure. Serious/silly. Worrier/laid back. Planner/procrastinator. Hopeful/pessimistic. Wishy/washy.  Mother/student. Seeking/content. Reverent/raucus.  To name a few.

Yet choosing one or the other of the pair feels like I've left a little, other part of me behind. Some contradictions (Adam & Eve in the Garden comes to mind) certainly require choices.  But my friend's midrashic story makes me wonder if some of the other contradictions each deserve a place in my pocket.  And yours?

Hmmm. Maybe it's more about the balance and knowing when to switch to the other pocket...

 

Today's Maddy watch: en route to Beijing, flying over the north pole (maybe seeing the Northern Lights?!)

Oh, Eleanor...

...thank you, I needed that.

"One thing life has taught me: If you are interested, you never have to look for new interests. They come to you. When you are genuinely interested in one thing, it will always lead to something else."

"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop and look fear in the face...do the thing you think you cannot do."

~Eleanor Roosevelt